What are homosexuals supposed to do if they can't change?

by Matt Slick

What should a homosexual do if he becomes a Christian and his same-sex desires do not go away? Can he force himself to change? Or, is he supposed to live in frustration and not getting married for the rest of his life?

First of all, before I attempt to answer these questions, I want to express my sympathy for the dilemma in which repentant homosexuals can find themselves. Whether or not homosexuality is an orientation by birth, the practice is still condemned by Scripture and like other sins such as adultery, fornication, and lying, it needs to be avoided.

Second, there's no magic pill, no quick phrase, no psychological attitude adjustment that just makes homosexual tendencies go away or become tolerable. The only thing that can produce such a radical change is the work of God. It has happened before with people where they have become Christians and by God's grace have been able to fully repent of their homosexual tendencies. It can happen with anyone who comes to Christ, but very frequently God does not immediately deliver us from our sinful habits. We have to realize that we often struggle with our past sins, as well as the effects of those sins upon us. If a person, for example, was addicted to pornography and has developed a strong desire for it, upon becoming a Christian that desire may still exist and he would then be forced to struggle with it. This can be difficult, frustrating, and very discouraging. We have to realize that though sin can be forgiven, the effects often continue and we must all deal with the effects of our past sins because God often uses them to humble us and teach us.

So what is the homosexual who desires repentance supposed to do when he still has that attraction for the same sex? Simple. He is to confess it is as sin, trust in Christ to help him work through it, seek help from others, and ask God to change him. 

People in sin need to do what is biblical - repent. No matter what the sin, whether it be homosexuality, or adultery, or lying, or stealing, the person needs to stop doing it regardless of whether or not someone has such a tendency. Some may say this is not fair because they were born homosexual and this would be a severe struggle for them. It is true that it would be a struggle, but there are people who were born with lust for the opposite sex and struggle in resisting pornography and lust. Just because someone is born with a particular tendency does not excuse the person from behaving properly. Instead, homosexuals and anyone else enslaved to sin are to do their best to repent, and by God's grace, those tendencies can be changed.


About The Author

Matt Slick is the President and Founder of the Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry.